Where does it take us?

I have had a pretty rough year this 2009, but it has had "the Good Times" you know the memorable stuff where growth as a human being occurs and shit. This is June the half of the year, it feels longer, much, much longer but some how I've managed to maintain contact with reality, and the reality that I am getting older and I have done nothing, I have just collected interesting facts along the way but never produced anything great. And who the fuck says I have to do anything with my life; that's the thing I want to do something for me first, something I can be content with, so far I guess I haven't found it, or haven't searched enough. Call it selfishess but I need to take care of me first or otherwise I would not exist, I would be alive but mearly as a puppet that does everything she is told, taught and no real, proper experience. I need that selfishness, I need that greed, that lust and that anger to breath almost.

We all need a plan, or something to look forward to, and a strategy to get us from one room to the next until we obtain a nice enough view. I hope the trip goes well.

I know I am too vague when I write but I feel as if I can't be more explicit with the details, the juicy bit are not mine to share. I tell you this paranoia is a trickster.